Overcoming the Demands and Challenges as a Member of the LGBTQIA+ Community

 

               Being a member of the LGBTQIA+ is not easy compared to being male and female. I for one, representing one of the letters in the LGBTQIA+ community have experienced discrimination and stereotyping many times and in many ways.

            Having a different gender preference, orientation and identity, I was at times called sissy and weakling by my classmates in the elementary grade. Bullying was so rampant in those days that there were times I thought of not going to school anymore. This was worsened because in my primary grades, I was then living with the family of my uncle so I have no parents to confide what I had been going through. My parents are both farmers so they have to work from a far province to provide our basic needs. What I was so thankful is I was an achiever and performing well in school which somehow covered up the gender-related inflicted pains by people in my formative years.

            Secondary high school was a lot better. I had two best friends with the same gender identity so we joined forces in battling the bullying, discrimination, stereotyping and adversities in school. I was renting a boarding house in the municipality where the school was located so I learned to be more independent. But what constrained somehow is the gender identity acceptance by the family, relatives and elders especially when they see you act and express yourself differently from the standards they thought you should follow.

            Stepping in college opened the door to more freedom of self-expressions. Joining gay pageants was one of those outlets. The feeling of belongingness was fulfilled at this stage. Hindrances that emanated from being an LGBTQIA+ member at times clouded the way but I still managed to study with good scholastic records. However, the academe is not excused in the perpetuation of gender discrimination and stereotyping. It was in the Military Science Course or popularly called ROTC where I experienced these. Gays were not allowed to join in the training. We were assigned at the quarter to wash clothes of the officers, cook for the officers’ lunch and clean the quarter. Every time the training was over, the officers would come and give us drills or let us do anything they like. A mistake would mean punishment like squat, push up, rolling on the ground, exposure under the sun’s heat or the worst lying together so the officer could cross over our bodies as if crossing a bridge. The trainees who served as spectators would laugh at us much to our embarrassment. I incurred absences and nearly dropped the subject. At the end, I got a 3.0 numerical grade which hampered me to receive academic award when I finished college.

            It was in college where I was fully aware of harsh and hurtful words hurled towards us LGBTQIA+ like “salot sa lipunan”, “manananggal ng lakas”, “makasalanan”, “bayot or bakla ka lang” and other words stripping off a person’s dignity. I just shrugged my shoulders thinking that these would come to pass when I find the spot where the Lord destined me to be.

            Finishing college and passing the licensure examination, all I thought was those were sufficient tickets to land a job. Being a neophyte in the world of job hunting, I tried to apply in a government agency but because of undefined hiring criteria that time and having nobody to guide me, I desperately lose every job I applied for. I was told to apply in the private sector instead to gain experience. I listened to the advice and applied in one of the private institutions in the province. I underwent the process from passing the required documents, demonstration teaching to the interview. I had done my very best and I was in the high hopes that maybe this time, I could make it. I had done well in every step of the process. It was during my follow up when I learned that I did not make it. The simple reason was I am a gay and that I could influence the learners when they will hire me as a teacher. I felt I carried the world when I heard the pronouncement. I was unjustifiably attacked based on my gender identity and not on my qualifications and ability as a teacher. How come this institution practices gender discrimination and is gender-insensitive when in fact it is even a Christian school?

            These experiences did not stop me from dreaming. With the coming of clearer guidelines for hiring and strict implementation, I eventually got a teaching position in the government. I taught productively for nine years producing quality and competent learners. My school heads in the schools where I taught could attest to my achievements and accomplishments as a teacher. I got promoted to a position in the division office to where I am currently working up to this day.

            Looking back to the path I walked through twists and turns, I have come to the full realization that as a person belonging to the LGBTQIA+ community you have to stay steadfast to your life’s goal. Keep dreaming. Keep fighting. Many gender-related discriminations which will rise from your innate gender identity will challenge you. Keep aiming for your goal and one day when you reached your dreams, you will realize that they are worth fighting for after all. Respect may not be acquired through high positions but it is gained because you never changed your real identity while finding the right spot where God wants you to be planted, bloom and bear fruits.